10 Tips for How to Love Your Wife
No matter the length of your marriage, treat her like your bride.
- She is special – keep her that wayWhen most of us marry, it is because we have found a woman who is special in our eyes. Among all the women you have known, she has won your heart. Keep her that way – react to her as special, treat her as special, think of her as special.
- Don’t settle for lessThe all-too-common fairy tale version of marital bliss – and they lived happily ever after – fails to capture the reality of married love. When your realistic hopes for married love come face to face with the hard work necessary to realize those hopes, don’t wilt in the face of the challenge, don’t settle for less – keep that love alive.
- You married her for love – then love herMarried love thrives when there are consistent expressions of affection, and that same love shrivels up when such expressions are lacking. Let her know clearly, repeatedly and in a variety of ways that you love her.
- Be as polite toward her as you are toward a friendSo much of married life is lived out in everyday, ordinary love. Unfortunately for many couples, good manners, politeness and common courtesy are some of the first things to go after we say “I do”.
- Enjoy activities togetherThe busyness of commitments, obligations and responsibilities pulls many of us along like the currents of the mighty Mississippi. Whatever you and your wife enjoyed doing before you were married – make sure you continue to find the time to enjoy these activities together after the wedding.
- Romance herRemember that being lovers is one thing that distinguishes this relationship from the many other friendships you have.
- Do not avoid conflictYour wife wants to be heard. She wants to know that you are as interested in your life together as she is. Successful marriages are built on a shared life. If you are going to experience such a shared life, then conflict will be inevitable. And not only is it inevitable, but it is also necessary and (if done well) healthy.
- Do not criticizeCriticism is arguably the most destructive act (short of infidelity) that individuals can thrust on their partners. Agree to eliminate criticism from your marriage. It simply means that you will not insult or attack your wife in the process.
- Ask for and grant forgivenessA sincere apology along with an honest desire and effort to change can be incredibly healing to a wounded spouse. Be quick to apologize. Be equally quick to forgive.
- Today is a new dayEach day we have to come and put it on the line again – we have to once again make it clear that she is special and that she was right to fall in love with us.
